The Daily Blade, Volume 1, Issue 72
WONDER WILL NEVER CEASE.
I have astonished some people with my fun newsletter by putting it back out. In a way, I hope to entertain you all. I also have big plans for something special. More on that when FFVIII is beaten by a certain someone who will remain nameless unless he chooses to tell these wonderful, wonderful people his, which I don't see happening anytime soon. Well, I am adding a few new columns to this wonderful, wonderful newsletter and I hope it's to your enjoyment. They will be marked, this issue only, with an asterik. Due to the additions there will be shorter stories in this issue. Since it is my second issue in a long time, I guess that I a little rusty at my skill. Of course, that couldn't have anything to do with the fact that it's midnight. God I'm so stupid stupid stupid. Well, enjoy issue 72.
*SONG OF THE DAY
Unpretty, by TLC.
While some of the lyrics seem to be stupid, or unfitting, this song's meaning is as inspirational as it is enjoyable. Some lyrics, such as "Now I'm in stupid" and "All the makeup that Mac can make" (who's Mac?)***As of the print date, that's what was posted as the lyrics, it's actually "Man"*** are overlooked because the song is trying to get at people from the inside, not about what's on the outside.
*DID YOU NOTICE: The Simpsons.
Did you notice...
-In the "Lemon of Troy" episode, even though the kids can't spare a single lemon, they still manage to throw a lot at the shelbyville kids?
-Ralph is in both Lisa's and Bart's class?
-Todd and Rod are rarely ever seen at school?
-Homer enjoys sand in his underpants but marger doesn't?
-Hans Moleman is 33, but he works at a radio station, drives a truck, and is also a senior citizen?
8-Ball Mayhem!
Since you are bringing in some new columns, can we expect to see some old ones return? Such as "A Time to Laugh," "Check It Out," or "Storyboard."?
No. Yes. No. Check It Out will return, but only on a semi-regular basis. It will appear only when I have something worthwhile to talk about. The other two have given this magazine such bad ratings, I make more of the refreshments.
Episodes of the Blade!
Episode 36.
Joshua quickly surrenders when Mijca tells him that he has no place on the team. Saddened, he returns home. The team is confused because he didn't even want to join. In the confusion, Ash Ketchum, from Pallet Town, shows up to strangle the lilies in the pong. He is ultimatly ignored and leaves just as he came. The headquarters blows up and all fingers point to Malice, who was cooking with gas and a bag of sand that was half empty. Too bad they couldn't take it to New Jersey where it was needed most.
52-TWENTY
I was playing Final Fantasy 3 one day, when suddenly I was sucked into the game itself. While inside, I fought Kefka and defeated him. I then gained ultimate power, which I lost trying to get out of my television. I decided to leave video games alone for a while. I went for a walk and met up with a little bird. I looked at it and asked "Little bird, why are you so sad?" The bird replied the only way it could by flying as far away from me as possible. I felt offended, but I got over it when I came across a bag of diamonds that once belong to Liz Taylor. The were taylor made for her, so I left them there. They were of no use to me. As I continued, I went to a friend's house and watched "Roller Derby" until three A.M. when it finally ended. Heading back home, I pondered on my day's events. I came up with one question: If I was a june bug, would someone step on me?
Trivia Time.
Subject: Television.
1. What show envolves a girl who hunts vampires and the right guy? Hint: She also sells makeup on the side.
2. What show costars the original pink power ranger as the main character's friend, lover, and pillow when her bed is extra hard? Okay, ignore the last two comments.
3. This show, which also had recasting done to boost viewers, played people's funniest home videos and someone would win cash.
4. Still on cash, What show did Alanis Morrisette and Leann Rhimes compete on and lose?
5. This show had Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and two members of N-Synch at one time.
Answers.
1. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Go Sarah!!!!!!
2. Felicity, and Amy Jo Johnson, that former pink ranger, really had her work cut out for her to be taken seriously. Kudos to you Kimber, I mean, Amy.
3. You're the red, white, and blue. Oh, the funny things you do, America, America, and this is you. America's Funniest Home Videos. Bob Sagat was better than those new people, and the old theme song was better.
4. Star Search.
5. The Mickey Mouse Club. Oh, how I love Britney.