The Daily Blade, Volume 1, Issue 5
NEW READER SUSCRIBED AGAINST WILL.
Bored out of her mind, I decided to add one of my friends to the newsletter in hopes of her enjoying her spare time. Now remeber, if you don't like what you read, e-mail me and tell me you don't want to recieve it. I'll stop sending it to you. If you do like it, back issues 1-4 are available on request. Sadly, I do not have a copy of the special edition.
GIRL FROM OREGON INTERESTS GIRL.
Just two weeks ago, a girl moved down here, to Locust Grove of all places, from Oregon. She has no car, money, or friends and family here. Why she is here is also still a mystery. She works at the same place I work at. My sister is shocked to hear this and would like to learn more about her. Details are fuzzy at this point, but I'll keep you advised.
PARTY A REAL HEADBANGER.
Earlier tonight at the Locust Grove J-1 club party, I dove into a swimming pool not aware of the three foot shallow end. Normally I can stop myself, but not this time. WHAM! My head hit the pool bottom with an awful amount of force. Ouch!. I had a slight headache the remainder of the evening.
GLASS IS BAD, BUT ONLY ON THE WEEKENDS.
Yes, I do like glass, but how hazardous is it? Pretty glass is distracting. You could be staring at it and then lose track of time and become lost in a world of make-believe where you control the action! Clear glass is a serious threat. How do you know when it's there? You're walking across a museum when suddenly, BONK!, you hit an invisible object. All your friends laugh at you and you feel humiliated and wonder "What did I hit?" Of course when you look around to see what you did hit and wonder about it, your friends will probably laugh at you more. Here's a fun one, you are in a snowball fight, and someone puts glass shards in a snowball, and you don't realize it, and they throw it at you, and it hits you and.... I think you know where this is going.
THE QUESTION "WHY?"
You might find yourself one day asking really pointless questions such as "Why do I sleep at night and not the day?" or "Why can't I be the one that's gets to go to Sea World?" or "Why does he ride for his money?". Well, there are no real answers to these questions, just to "Why" you ask them in the first place. Dr. Zibous says "Why is only a three letter word." That's all he said. When he said it, I punched him for making a waste out of my time. Upon solving nothing, I looked on the internet for help. Gyro, computer genious, asked me why I wanted to know. This was good. He was asking me exactly what I wanted to find out. So, I just gave his computer a virus and was on my way. Why do people even try to help? All they say are pointless things that amount to nothing. I finally asked Cante Doette and he said "I don't own a yellow breifcase." I was baffeled, but further along with the answer. Anyway, I came to the conclusion, "Why ask why? Try Bud Dry." Then I realized this was provoking people to buy beer. So now, I ultimately gave up. I figured "Why even bother?" What do you guys think?
Trivia Time.
Subject: Board Games!
1. This game involves twelve people trying to find the will to a wealthy woman's estate. One of the characters is a cat.
2. With a calendar for a board, you try to get more money than the opposing players. You can play up to twelve months.
3. You've got to get to the kitchen without waking your father.
4. Time is against you as you put different shapes in their respected places.
5. Little fruit guys are under your control as you get them out of the factory. Don't let them become raisins!
6. B 1, A3, you sank my.....
7. Save the patient, but don't touch his sides.
8. Hit the man into the pan. ( This is easier than it seems)
9. You tackle your opponent and get the ball, but the ref fears the crowd so you lose possesion of it! Stick with it, and don't lose you head, or arm, or leg.
10. Crepe', papyrus, and toilet.
Answers.
1. Thirteen Dead End Drive.
2. Payday!
3. Don't Wake Daddy!
4. Perfection!
5. Grape Escape.
6. Chess, no wait, the Queen's not THAT big. Battleship.
7. Operation! I always lost this game. I hated that stupid butterfly!
8. Mousetrap. Was it too hard?
9. Bloodbowl.
10. They are all types of paper. Tribond..